Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Planets, dreams & the unexpected visitor

Quotes - Pinterest board





I've heard a lot this year: "I love that you're so independent and don't need anyone." It's a blessing and a curse to be lumped into that sentence. I'm glad that I inspire independence and yet it always makes me sad when my friends don't think I need them. I may be head strong in solving my own problems and going on my own trail without consulting anyone, but the cliche is true, no man is an Island, or Woman.

While my cousin was here I took a bad fall and hurt my foot. I was glad to have him around to help with things here and there. After saying goodbye to my cousin and other visitors I realized just how isolated I have made myself. Sure, there are people around but they're working, we can't just sit and have a coffee where they tell me intricate details about their lives. I have enjoyed my hermit styles but I'm ready to be reintegrated. I'm thankful everyday for the communication powers of the internet. It's the way I can connect with my friends and have great long talks over skype, quick notes in g-chat, sharing silly things on facebook. I was just chatting with Jenn when I realized that without the internet and technology, I wouldn't have been able to live so immersed in nature for six months, I would not have come across the house sitting opportunity out in the rainforest.

So, I've been mopey this past week! With the foot, and the constant rain, I've felt the guilt of not being a good "dog" mom. I haven't taken the pups on any good walks and haven't been able to roughhouse with them. I was finally open to some company. When I consciously have a daydream and make a shift in my mind, I feel my whole world shift, like I've sat down and said 'yes' wholeheartedly to something, so then I can direct myself to that new idea. I'll try to explain...

Let's Get Going - Pinterest board
Sitting at the table with my foot up drinking a tea, I started imagining having tea with someone beside me. Someone specific that I haven't spent a full 24hrs with since I was 16. Someone who occasionally makes me tear my hair out but is my best match at Scrabble. Someone who I love dearly, always have hope for, but may be tempted to throw in the back pond with caimans. 

As I was talking to my cousin, looking out at the white sandy beach, and at dogs that I consider kids, I remembered a strange dream during a period of nine months when this person and I weren't speaking to each other. In the dream I'm living with my family on a white sandy beach, and said person just shows up one day, and we stand there staring at each other. I have to decide
if I'm gong to let them in. After a long discussion, "I would let them in now" I confess to my cousin. To everyone's surprise, two days later that someone announced a ticket bought, and a visit set. When I told my cousin the arrival dates he explained the planetary significance of Wednesday November 28th, it's the day of a full moon and the last lunar eclipse of the year, a time for radical changes, new opportunities and the opening of new paths.

I really enjoyed this quote that I found: Venus, Mercury, Saturn and the North Node are in Scorpio during the Gemini Eclipse. Reminding us that as we emerge out of Scorpio’s ashes of the past. We are processing pain, trust issues and betrayals. Yet, these negative emotions will fade into the mist with no lingering memories. As we move higher in vibration. We will be free from these ancient haunting happenings.

Also, in line with the having enough of being a content hermit, I've started dating someone! My last actual relationship wasn't since living in Toronto, and it ended in a way that left me pretty crushed. So, Here's to emerging out of the ashes of the past, being fiercely independent, while absolutely needing the wonderful people that have come into my life. 

Gift Ideas - Pinterest board

2 comments:

  1. Do not assume that she
    who seeks to comfort you now,
    lives untroubled among
    the simple and quiet words
    that sometimes do you good.

    Her life may also have much
    sadness and difficulty
    that remains far beyond yours.

    Were it otherwise,
    she would never have been
    able to find these words.


    ~Rainer Maria Rilke

    ReplyDelete
  2. Especially when your best friend's a therapist ;)

    ReplyDelete